food

Note: I am currently (Mar ’18) no longer including potato juice in my diet. I consumed it regularly for a few months over the preceding summer, and it facilitated a feeling of well-being that I hadn’t felt for some time. The preparation process is laborious, tedious, time-consuming, and expensive, and so with the new knowledge in hand, that I can — it’s possible — feel a certain way, I instead ventured to find more elegant solutions to achieve similar ends.

When my digestion got bad last year, like real bad, at the nadir of my eliminatory existence, when I couldn’t poop for three–four days, I decided to cut at once from my approved foods list — diet — any foods and food products that could pose even remote challenge to digest. Namely, that meant starches were off the board because of the endotoxin thing, and also spices and additives — like ascorbic acid, citric acid, natural and artificial flavors — words on labels I was purposefully ignoring on prepackaged goods, like applesauce and salsa, to maintain a tattered thread of sanity about my dietary intake — I eliminated these in caution of potential inflammatory responses to them. Variable overload. I realize this may sound extreme but I viewed my condition as such.

So, because I committed to this change which involved not eating a bunch of foods I was previously eating, and there was a nutritional deficit to supersede, I combed tediously through every single Ray Peat clip for ideas consumable, specifically those pro-digestive, and one curious substance disclosed with reserved enthusiasm™ by Ray on several occasions is potato juice. Cooked potato juice, to be specific. When Ray mentions something in a positive light, it’s often worthwhile to investigate oneself.

Why potato juice cooked? My understandings are elementary and rudimentary — Bio III drop-outs bump heads — but the thought is that cooked potato juice is uniquely rich in amino acids and keto acids. Naturally-occurring ammonia in the body transaminates the keto acids into even more amino acids as needed; in total ergo there are many aminos.

What is special about amino acids? Well, (dons rainbow-colored propellor beanie and pocket protector), amino acids are the “building blocks” of proteins and dietary proteins must be digested — scientific term: degraded — into amino acids before they can be utilized by the body for its muscles and tissues and whatnot. So some correlation can be made between amino acids equaling proteins.

The amino acid composition of a potato, in actuality, when accounting for transamination, is rich — on the level of egg yolk — and the bioavailability of its nutrients — which includes vitamins and minerals too — is high when the potato is prepared tactically.

And why not just bite into a raw potato? Okay — to be honest I’ve not looked deeply into this matter but from what I understand, raw potatoes contain toxic leave-me-alone!-type chemical compounds — because they would rather not be exhumed and eaten, like most plants — however those chemicals can be to some extent deactivated by heat, though possibly not by a lot, but still, and of course there is the starch, which, even when cooked, can be troublesome for individuals’ GI tracts to process; I imagine the raw starch has got to be worse on the gut. Plus who in their right mind wants to chew through a mound of raw potatoes?

All this is to say cooked potato juice is an easy-to-consume, easy-to-digest concentrate high in vitamins, minerals, and protein. The nutrition of X pounds of potatoes is condensed into a much more approachable volume of broth.

Pinch Me!

But what does it do?? Why expatiate at such depth?

The reason I’ve felt so inclined to scribble a word or three on the esoteric matter of potato juice is that I’ve found it to be an incredible skin rejuvenator. Like, unbelievably effective, for me, at least. The first time I didn’t totally botch cooking the juice, it hit me with this reverberant bliss, not so dissimilarly from a first drunk or first high, and I thought to myself, “This does something.” (Most foods/supplements/damn-sure-to-improve-your-health-products don’t do anything. Efficaciousness is rare.) I knew I needed to try it again.

My face, in particular, just feels tight after consuming the juice. It provides this near-instantaneous facelift. I look younger. And I feel virile, too; the areas of the body with the thinnest epidermal layer more noticeably exude ephebic elasticity; along with the face that includes the genitalia. I’m a whole new me. And this happens with rather resigned predictability too.

The effect is analogous to a receding hairline returning, or thinning hair thickening. That’s how strongly I feel about it.

Has the juice improved my digestion? No, I cannot substantiate that notion. On the contrary, it acts upon me as a laxative at times, which I will admit is a relief when my bowels are not moving though obviously not optimal; however, the epidermal revivification I perceive as a stupendously positive aftereffect and I look very much forward to cooking up a batch of the juice at least once, usually twice, sometimes thrice, per week.

And because I found few resources that explained the preparation process in detail, which is not as straightforward as it may seem and is easy to mess up, I thought I’d share my current, somewhat refined technique among interested readers. With that introduction over and clever homograph in tow, let’s cook.

Ingredients

• Potatoes (~8 lbs unpeeled weight) (large size)
• Salt (a few pinches) (preferably Morton C&P)

Prep time: ~30 minutes — Cook time: ~1 hour

A comprehensive link list of kitchen tools is located below.

Instructions

Step 1: Choose Potatoes

Larger potatoes are more efficiently manipulated and thus take less time than smaller potatoes to peel and cut. I’ve bought smaller potatoes for, like, science and regretted it every time. Feel free to experiment but I think you’ll soon side with the inanity that bigger is better.

I don’t think the variety of potato matters much — e.g., waxy v. starchy — because the starch will be almost entirely removed in the end product and nutritional data suggests homogeneity between species, but waxy potatoes tend to be smaller and thus less wieldy so you’ll by default spring for all-purpose/Idaho/starchy/floury varieties. Sweet potatoes are different critters altogether; I am unfamiliar with them and would hesitate to recommend you juice up a batch.

Walmart sells 8-lb bags of jumbo Russets for $4.52 currently. That is 57¢/pound. Cheap! They work though I’d not eat them in an un(highly)processed state. They’re often green and/or carry an astringent smell raw. Mutants be damned.

Organic potatoes I’ve found rare to come by — my local Whole Foods doesn’t even carry them right now; they are a seasonal item — and at a reasonable price point, if they are to be found. Suggestion: Pick out the best-looking and -smelling conventionals available in your area.

Step 2: Peel Potatoes

This isn’t necessary, per se, but I do it. And I think you should too. I often come across bruises and other abnormalities underneath the skin that I’d rather not make their way into my juice. The skin itself is suspect for containing toxins and pesticides if not “certified organic.” You may as well be thorough when investing the time here.

I peel each potato, give it a quick rinse to remove any crud, then set it aside in my 5-qt stainless steel bowl. Once the bowl is mostly filled, I know I’ve got a good amount to juice and that will not boil over in my 3-qt saucepan.

Step 3: Cut Potatoes

If using a juicer, cut into whatever girth length-wise strips that will fit down the chute. I don’t own a juicer but I imagine yay size is sensible:

If using a blender, cut into small chunks like this:

And drop them into your blender carafe with an inch or two of water:

Step 4: Extract Juice

If using a juicer, you should know what to do.

If using a blender, you will blend to a smooth consistency and then extract the juice from the resulting potato smoothie in some fashion. I came up with a low-tech man-powered pressing rig using an LSHP filter cloth and three S.S. bowls:

I push hard against the wall, squeezing the two bowls together, compacting the mash, and juice oozes down into the third bowl. Yield seems okay. It is a laborious procedure though. For the non-neanderthalic: a hydraulic press will extract more juice with less effort (the JP Factory juice press is what I am eyeing up currently; please do further my shallow insight into this area).

Step 5: Triple-Filter Juice

I will at this point wash my blender carafe and filtering equipment to give the starch in the juice a moment to settle, then:

1. Pour the juice through the sieve into the saucepan,
2. Pour the juice back through the sieve into the S.S. bowl, and
3. Again pour the juice through the sieve into the saucepan.

Wash the empty apparatuses out/off after each step and — importantly! — discard the wispy bubbly gunk down the sink.

The reason to remove the overt starch now is that if cooked, the starch will gelatinize, stick to the bottom of the pan, and burn. Not good.

Step 6: Low Simmer for ~1 Hour

The objective here is to bring the juice to a low simmer so it will cook and reduce but not allow it boil over. The juice will want to boil over. It undergoes some kind of compositional change and will volumetrically proliferate with rabid abandon under too-high heat, which high heat is a relatively low heat.

Through trial and error I’ve determined where to tune the dial on my electric stove so that an eventual simmer will be reached without overflow. Your stove will probably be different and I’m mad jealous if you’ve got gas. (Electric blows.) Keep a close eye on the liquid the first few times you temper it until you’ve got a gauge on its ebullience.

I cook without a lid because of the aforementioned boiling-over issue and I want juice to reduce. And about the “simmer”: it’s more of an active current you’re looking for. The liquid won’t bubble unless the heat is turned way up.

Now, I don’t know if ~1-hours cooking time is optimal. That’s simply a measure I bumped into on the web and the juice — by the end, a broth more like — tends to turn out better when I let it go for an hour-plus. Perhaps this is a matter of concentration and taste. Or maybe a higher percentage of toxins fall to the heat the longer it goes. I lack certainty. All I know is that the boiling-over effect seems to cease at around one half of one hour.

Salt can be added during this process but exercise restraint; it’s easy to over-salt the solution because it will reduce in volume by, like, half. It’s probably more prudent to salt afterward.

Finally, a double-boiler can be used, I guess? That approach is mentioned briefly in this interview @ ~41:48. I haven’t tried cooking the juice that way myself for lack of proper equipment and reasoning why a runny liquid warrants double-boiling.

Update! — I cobbled together a makeshift double-boiler last night and the result was … pretty similar! Major difference: The precipitate didn’t coalesce as thoroughly so not as much could be filtered out; however, the precipitate didn’t taste as bad. It was tolerable. So if that part — still unidentified — is to be consumed, then double-boiling makes sense. The broth tasted more watery as opposed to burnt, I suppose. It wasn’t as strong as it is from single-boiling.

Another Update! — If the burner is set to super low, lower than I have photographed here, as in low enough that the precipitate will not be much agitated by the heat, it — the precipitate — will congeal more thoroughly and sink. This is the fabled scrambled-egg substance, and it is consumable. Cooking time should be extended correspondingly, and the next step, filtering, becomes unnecessary.

Step 7: Filter into Stainless Steel Bowl

Pour the hot broth through the fine-mesh sieve and into the stainless steel bowl and sprinkle some salt in if you would like. More sediment precipitates during cooking, and it’s pretty gross-looking (and -tasting) so we want to remove it, though the mesh of the sieve is not fine enough to filter it all out. You can allow the particles to settle in the bowl and then decant to separate them. I’ve tried using a coffee filter to achieve this end but found the process to be terribly inefficient.

I find the stainless steel bowl critical because its low heat capacity allows the juice to cool to consumable temperature relatively quickly. Broth poured straight into a glass Mason jar, for example, will stay tongue-scorchingly hot for what seems like forever.

Step 8: Enjoy!

The end result is a potatoey broth very rich in vitamins, minerals, and protein. The nutrition from however many pounds of potatoes went into this. It’s potent stuff. I am very content sipping it as is like a soup. I find the flavor fine. I suppose you could add fresh herbs or well-cooked mushrooms or whatever you fancy to jazz it up.

Readers! — What are your experiences with potato juice? Have any of the steps been unclear? Do you suggest any improvements to this recipe? I am but one person sharing his thoughts and perceptions. Collaborate with me!

In particular, I am curious whether the broth will refrigerate or freeze well; I always sluuuurp it down immediately.

Update! — I’ve now both refrigerated the broth (for one and two days) and frozen it (for one day). The frozen broth tasted way fresher. So I recommend freezing if not consuming it all immediately!

Also, hydraulic juice press aficionados: Help! What model is best?

Tools

• Potato Peeler: Kuhn Rikon
• Stainless Steel Bowls: Vollrath 47935
• Blender: Vitamix 5200 — though I imagine pretty much any blender will be able to adequately atomize potatoes.
• Juice Press Cloth: PURE LSHP
  • Two stainless steel bowls can serve as a makeshift hydraulic press in combination with the cloths if you’re physically capable and have the proper wall/countertop space. Most readers — and even I — will want to look into hydraulic presses (maybe the Welles or JP Factory) if going this non-juicer route. Norwalk and PURE are expensive all-in-one options.
• Juicer: I had been window-shopping the Omega VSJ843 and Tribest Slowstar before settling to use my already-owned Vitamix. Those models seemed to be the easiest to operate and clean and would yield a fair yield. The ease of operation and sanitization are heavy considerations, in my mind at least. Juicers can be a bitch to operate and maintain. The blender + hydraulic press combo will produce the highest yield, if that’s what you’re after.
• Fine-Mesh Sieve: Rosle 7.9-Inch Fine-Mesh Kitchen Stainless Steel Strainer
• Saucepan: Cuisinart MCP193-18N
  • While this saucepan is adequate, clad construction is inappropriate and overkill for application here. Disc-bottom would be preferable. The Demeyere Atlantis 3.2-quart is on my if-I-win-the-lottery-or-am-somehow-otherwise-bequeathed-with-a-fortuitous-financial-windfall list. Any old stock pot would work fine, too.

While unpacking boxes after my parents’ move in the fall, this recipe book — titled Old Pottstown Recipes — surfaced. I believe it belonged to my maternal grandmother (“Grandmom”) and then my mother acquired it after she passed away. To give some context, Pottstown is a borough located ~40 miles outside Philadelphia and about half that from where I (and my mother) grew up. I’m not sure I’ve ever actually been to Pottstown before — there is not a lot interesting going on in P-town these days; the utilitarian industries that once thrived there died down — but it’s certainly within my geographic locale.

Anyway, I began flipping through the book and found it delightfully quaint; the recipes are presented and explained often with the utmost simplicity (“Put together and cook.”) and it’s fun to examine the palettes of those who’ve not been ruined by the food scientists of today. Dishes that now appear dubious would have not-so-long ago been considered standard fare.

I’m uncertain when the book was published (the first handful of pages where a date may have been printed were lost) but I believe many of the recipes originate from the 1920s and earlier. Terms like “ice box,” “moderate oven,” and “butter size of walnut” help provide context in this regard, as do certain ingredients themselves which I’ll delve into shortly. An article from the Pottstown Mercury in 1963 mentions a 40-year-old “Pottstown Recipes” cookbook, and who knows — maybe this is the same one.

… Are You Going to Eat That?

Some of the more peculiar and archaic dishes include:

• Clam broth (for an invalid)
• Terrapin
• Dandelion
• Corn pudding
• Moulded salad
• Lemon butter mayonnaise
• Cucumber sauce
• Huckleberry pudding
• Orange Charlotte
• Blitz torte
• Smudge
• Polar chips
• Parsley sandwiches

Among the trends I’ve noticed between recipes, the most telling is the lack of vegetable and seed oils as ingredients … likely because Procter & Gamble was still in the early processes of propagandizing the edibility of Crisco at the time.

Other commonalities? Lots of eggs, butter, and cream.

I’m almost captivated enough to rummage through more old community recipe books and track the usage of common ingredients. Famous Old Receipts: Used a Hundred Years and More in the Kitchens of the North and the South looks like another solid resource from around this same time period and region. I imagine there are only so many early-twentieth-century documentations of American cuisine out there, and it would be possible to compile a database capable of mapping trends — like the adoption of certain cooking fats into households throughout the years — and make correlations with rises in diseases and parallel marketing campaigns.

Taste Me, You Will See

I may at some point type out the recipes so that A) they’re easier to peruse and B) it’s more likely I try some of them — and maybe you will too! — but for now, the book can be accessed as a single PDF or JPGs of the individual pages. Both downloads are about 50 MB.

Bon appétit!

art illustris

After a brief and bitter foray into the world of home coffee brewing, I realized I simply do not have the talent to finesse a palatable caffeinated beverage out of cheap beans and a plastic plunger. Even my background in chemistry could not bail me out of that frugal predicament.

This left me at a crossroads: either upgrade my gear and stock up on kopi luwak, or settle for instant.

Needless to say, I settled. Getting serious about coffee brewing can be pricey and time intensive, plus I’M LAZY. If I want to have exceptional coffee, I’ll pay someone else to make it for me.

However, my standards still remain high, and if I’m going to be drinking instant coffee, it’s got to be the best damn instant coffee little money can buy. This entry will document my ongoing taste testing and dogged quest to become the ultimate instant coffee snob.

All brews were made with 1 tablespoon of instant coffee, 4 tablespoons of granulated white sugar, 1 teaspoon of refined coconut oil, and 12 ounces of hot spring water.

These are the unadulterated thoughts that ran through my mind as I consumed each cup…

The Reviews

Café Bustelo: $1.51/oz @ Wegmans, $1.86/oz @ Amazon

“Woah. There is definitely caffeine in here. I think I went overboard with that heaping tablespoon I dumped in my mug. It has flavor. It’s slightly sludgy… BUT THERE’S CAFFEINE. Goes down pretty smooth. Would be great if you needed to stay awake for a week straight and couldn’t afford cocaine.”

Jacobs Krönung: $1.71/oz @ Wegmans, $1.38/oz @ Amazon

“The jar looks cool. Green is a neat color. Oh right, coffee. Not much flavor going on here. Airy. Reminds me of… baking soda? Yeah. Wish I was more buzzed. Wish I didn’t know what baking soda tastes like. Maybe two tablespoons would have been better. Inoffensive is probably the best word to describe it. People who watch the Hallmark Channel would definitely drink this stuff.”

Jacobs Cronat Gold: $1.71/oz @ Wegmans, $1.20/oz @ Amazon

“I taste burning wood chips. It’s like I’m in Cub Scouts all over again. Similar airiness to its brother Krönung. The flavor festers and I don’t particularly enjoy it. I wish my mom would come pick me up from camp. There’s nothing to do here!!! I have a feeling this jar will slowly make its way to the back of the cupboard where it will remain for the rest of eternity alongside my half-eaten bag of banana crisps.”

Medaglia d’Oro: $1.65/oz @ Wegmans, $1.62/oz @ Amazon

“I think medaglia d’oro means gold medal. Good thing I took three semesters of Italian during college. Taste is somewhere between Jacobs Gold and Bustelo. It’s smoky with only an inkling of odorous wood. Wood. Huhuhuh. Definitely drinkable. Concentrated but that’s partially because of its fine grind. I bet I could snort it. Good flavor to caffeine ratio. Doesn’t upset my stomach. I give it a silver medal.”

Ferrara: $1.85/oz @ Wegmans, $3.13/oz @ Amazon

“It tastes like I’m drinking the wrong end of a smoldering cigarette. Evokes the coffee equivalent of bitter beer face. If I was ever Secret Santa for someone I didn’t like, this would be one of their gifts.”

Nescafé Clásico: $0.78/oz @ Walmart, $0.78/oz @ Amazon

“Wow, this has not one, but two accented letters in its name. I’m not sure I am worthy to partake of this fancy brew. First sip… pretty sure this is the same coffee they serve at Denny’s. At least I don’t have to deal with muffled Garth Brooks yodeling in the background too. I’m actually kind of enjoying the taste, but it’s starting to stagnate and my mouth feels dry. I really don’t want to finish this cup but I feel obligated.”

[1 hour later]

“I’ve become progressively more and more dehydrated since drinking this ‘coffee’… I’m not sure what’s happening… oh god… IT’S SUCKING MY WILL TO LIVE. Would be funny to give this to a friend shortly before they have to deliver a big speech.”

Great Value: $0.56/oz @ Walmart

“The jar says both ‘Great Value’ and ‘Premium’ on it; I think that’s an oxymoron. The taste is making me cringe… it’s got this sour, medicinal bite to it. Reminds me of repressed terrors at the dentist’s office. The flavor is now dulling and I think I might actually drink the whole cup. There is a very real possibility it is laced with Novocain or some other local anesthetic. (Well played, Walmart.) I will regret drinking this.”

Pilon: $1.67/oz @ Amazon

“My spoon can’t fit into the 1.75 ounce jar. -10 points. Has a yellow lid that is identical to Bustelo (albeit a tenth of the size). Grind looks incredibly similar as well. Says it is a ‘100% pure coffee made from a blend of beans from one or more of the following countries: Brazil, Colombia, Costa Rica, El Salvador, Ecuador, Guatemala, Mexico, and Nicaragua.’ Does it come with frequent flyer miles too? Dark but murky flavor. Tastes a bit watered down. It’s close to Bustelo but not quite as strong. I wish it had a little more of a bite or caffeine kick to it. Musty aftertaste. Old people. I will probably finish this jar but won’t go out of my way to buy it again.”

Maxwell House: $0.69/oz @ Wegmans, $0.70/oz @ Amazon

“Comes in a ‘lightweight, EZ-open jar’ and is commended by the Arthritis Foundation for its ‘ease-of-use.’ I’m really glad that the friendliness of the jar such a point of emphasis of their marketing campaign. The aroma is pretty noxious and I am predicting I won’t make it to the ‘last drop.’ First sip made me cough violently. It gives a very authentic experience of walking into an old folk’s home and breathing in wafts of antiseptic fumes. My tongue feels weird. I think it’s being numbed. The flavor has changed and it’s not as pungent now, but for my safety and on the off chance I am consuming a neurotoxin this taste test is over.”

Folgers Classic Roast: $0.71/oz @ Wegmans, $0.65/oz @ Amazon

“My crazy uncle Glenn who once was attacked by a rabid squirrel drinks this crap religiously. Black. Grind looks and smells like cigar guts. Don’t ask me how I know about cigar guts. First hit sip made me cough. Can’t really put a finger on the taste. It’s not good but not awful. Somewhat bitter. Kind of like bad mids. (Oops. I didn’t say that.) I can see how my weathered uncle would enjoy this stuff. If I had no other option then I’d reluctantly tolerate Folgers but it would not be the best part of waking up.”

Whole Foods 365: $1.85/oz @ Whole Foods

“I actually really like Whole Foods aside from everything in the store being grossly overpriced and their cute cashiers always having boyfriends. (What gives?) For some reason I’m not all that optimistic about this coffee. Pretty clean taste. Not super strong or distinct but at least I didn’t gag. Flavor doesn’t stick; it dissipates kind of suddenly. A dash of cinnamon might put it over the top. HE LIKES IT!”

Mount Hagen: $3.40/oz @ Whole Foods, $2.45/oz @ Amazon

“This is pretty pricey because it’s organic. Far out, man. Jar is shaped neat. Octagon. Lid pops off when you twist it. I like that. It’s fun. It’s kind of like how I used to twist the heads off my sister’s Barbie dolls. I am worried the photo on the label is subliminally promoting Christianity though. Not super distinctive but there is almost no bitterness and the aftertaste fades gracefully. HALLELUJAH! I’m a believer. Praise be this cup of joe.”

Taster’s Choice House Blend: $1.21/oz @ Wegmans, $0.86/oz @ Amazon

“This is one of two recommended instants for the fabled ‘Bonus Cup.’ (That’s a recipe for another day when I have health care again.) The grounds smell like Eggo waffles. Upon adding hot water the aroma has now shifted to that of corn nuts. (I am definitely not at ‘all’ anxious to try this…) For being in the sub dollar-per-ounce group, it’s actually pretty Descend decent. Delivers a nice buzz but leaves behind a somewhat gnarly, burnt aftertaste. I can see how this would have fueled ‘Milo Goes to College.'”

Starbucks VIA Colombia: $8.05/oz @ Wegmans, $5.67/oz @ Amazon

“Ah, the snootiest of brews. I wish I had a beret or fedora to wear and iPhone to poke at while drinking this. Full bodied. Has chocolatey tones. Very smooth. Would give Wilt Chamberlain a run for his money.”

Starbucks VIA Italian Roast: $8.05/oz @ Wegmans, $5.67/oz @ Amazon

“Darkest roast yet. My breath is deadly. Close quarters conversations would be painful for the non-drinker. I can finally exert revenge on innocent victims for all those times my portly and pungent uncle Charlie would beckon my seven year old self and endlessly blab at me from 1-inch away during family gatherings while guzzling a Bud and smoking a cheap cigar.”

Maxim Mocha Gold: $0.53/oz @ Amazon

“This review is promising. It is a Korean-made three-in-one with coffee, sweetener, and creamer. What could go wrong? Initial whiff made me gag. The substance in my cup looks nothing the picture. NERVOUS. Tastes like murky pond water. I guess I diluted it too much. Better add a second packet. Not much change. Time to load up on sugar. Now it reminds me of a Frappuccino. I am also beginning to take an unexpected and irrational appreciation for Kim Jong-un. Thank you supreme leader for this glorious product! It is far superior to American snow coffee!”

The Winner

It’s currently a toss-up between Café Bustelo and Medaglia d’Oro. Both have a deceptively tolerable taste and are loaded with caffeine, plus they’re relatively inexpensive. You can’t really ask for much more than that.

I like the yellow jar better, and drinking it makes me feel like I am part of the Cuban drug cartel (“I’M TONY MONTANA!”), so Bustelo gets a slight edge.

Update: Medaglia has supplanted Bustelo for the top spot in my power rankings. Over the past ten months I’ve found the quality control of Bustelo to be suspect; a good jar is quite sensual, but far too often I’m left questioning my self-worth with each sip. Recommendation: rotate brands from cup to cup to maintain morale.

Update July 2015: Bustelo quality control has been on point as of late. Maybe word traveled that I’d knocked them a rank. You’re welcome, everyone. (Bustelo reclaims the top spot.)

Power Rankings

1. Café Bustelo
2. Medaglia d’Oro
3. Starbucks VIA Tribute Blend
4. Mount Hagen
5. Starbucks VIA Colombia
6. Starbucks VIA Italian Roast
7. Whole Foods 365
8. Pilon
9. Jacobs Krönung
10. Taster’s Choice House Blend
11. Maxim Mocha Gold
12. Jacobs Cronat Gold
13. Folgers Classic Roast
14. Great Value
15. Nescafé Clásico
16. Maxwell House
17. Ferrara

Taste is subjective, but any of the top seven should satisfy most palates. Avoid the bottom four at all costs.

Note: I tried Starbucks VIA Tribute Blend a few months after initially publishing this article and I unfortunately failed to properly review it, but it does crack the upper tier of the power rankings.

wikipaintings.org

I’ve been experimenting with food and diet since when with maternal guidance I became an herbivore at age 10, and thus with my limited but passable decade-plus of experience I’ve decided to periodically post “What I’m Eatin'” to keep track of where I’ve been and where I’m heading (as a dietary roadmap of sorts).

As this is the first entry of what will hopefully be a longstanding series, I’ll go into full detail behind my culinary choices.

Note: I claim to know nothing about nutrition; all I have are personal experiences and I recommend nothing to no one. Always be honest with how you feel and monitor objective benchmarks of health.

The Staple Foods

These are the foods I eat pretty much every day without fail, partly because I tend to believe they are nutritious, but mostly because they are cheap and easy (i.e. bachelor chow).

Orange Juice

I’ve been guzzling down about a half gallon of OJ per day for a couple years now. I had been on a high fruit diet consisting mostly of bananas and dates, then found dates to be too expensive (not to mention caustic to my teeth) and banana quality to be widely varying in Pennsylvania, so I turned to orange juice when I realized the taste would always be fairly consistent from carton to carton and its price point was favorable for a recent college graduate.

Fresh squeezed is best if oranges are ripe, local, and in season, otherwise I stick with organic pasteurized (no pulp). Lately I’ve been tossing in a teaspoon of pickling salt, which is more pure than table salt, to test a higher sodium intake on myself.

OJ is drank mostly for the simple carbohydrates and because it’s also got vitamins and minerals.

Protip: I used to drink water with lemon upon waking, but the acidity in the lemon combined with the acidity of the OJ I would consume shortly thereafter was a bad combo. Nixing the lemon relieved any indigestion.

Eggs

Organic pasture eggs scrambled in refined coconut oil helped break my recent year long rendezvous with veganism and have been a mainstay in my diet ever since. I typically start my day with 4 scrambled eggs, seasoned to my liking, washed down with OJ. I’ll also throw back a raw egg or two after a workout, totaling an average of about 5 eggs per day.

I have found pasture eggs to be far superior in quality to any other type of eggs (organic or not) and will bite the bullet to pay a premium on them. I buy local if possible to support local farms while also paying nearly half of what the pasture eggs at a local retailer would cost.

Eggs are good for a bunch of different vitamins and some minerals. I tend not to worry about the cholesterol.

Milk

For years I considered dairy to be the devil, but the work of Ray Peat convinced me to give it a second chance. This is somewhat of a new addition to my diet, but I’ve been drinking anywhere from a quart to a half gallon of grass fed organic milk per day, drowned in molasses for taste (hat tip Matt Stone).

I’ve mostly been drinking lightly pasteurized cow milk, since it’s most accessible and cheapest for me, but I do have me some raw goat when I can ahold of it. I feel the goat milk is more potent (when raw), but either will do.

Drinking milk has been an easy way to get extra calories in my belly. I’ve preferred whole milk over 2% or skim almost solely for the extra energy, as I’m trying to put on some weight. The taste is also slightly preferable.

Honey

It’s quick carbs. Lately I’ve kept a squeeze bottle on hand whenever I work out to slurp on between sets (hat tip Raw Brahs), or throughout the day. Again, I make an effort to purchase fresh, local, and organic if my budget permits.

A ballpark estimate of my honey consumption might be 2-4 tablespoons a day.

Carrots

Honestly, I’m not sure how effective I find carrots to be, but there are people out there who swear by the Ray Peat raw carrot salad. (And there appears to be scientific evidence to back it up.)

I’m lazy, so I just peel and eat one carrot, omitting the salad-ification process, on more days than not. Five-pound bags of organic carrots are cheap, stay fresh in the fridge a while, and taste ok, so I eat ’em.

A low maintenance food with possibly high benefit, if there is one.

Gelatin

My go-to bedtime drink is an anti-stress elixir consisting of 4 tablespoons of this gelatin, 1 tablespoon of honey, 1 teaspoon of coconut oil, and 1 cup of hot water. Especially after a tough workout, I can feel the warm liquid pulsate throughout my muscles and deliver the much needed and easily assimilated macronutrients.

Ok… maybe that’s not how the body works, but the drink does have an endothermic and calming effect. Two cups before bed and I sleep like a rock.

Molasses

I use molasses as a sweetener and calorie booster for my milk. It’s essentially a refined sugar, but is also a surprisingly dense source of several minerals.

The sweet sludge has been included in my daily repertoire for only a couple weeks now, so only time will tell if it sticks around. The taste might wear on me and my digestive tract seems to have a minor amount of difficulty fully digesting it. (Infer from that what you will.)

In the Rotation

These are foods I don’t eat every day, but do often consume at least on a weekly basis.

Oysters

I treat these filter feeders more as a supplement than a food. They are calorically sparse but loaded with a couple hard-to-get minerals, specifically copper and zinc.

I typically eat the canned ones a couple times a week, though I may pony up and get fresh ones more often, as I question the quality of prepackaged shellfish.

Popcorn

I am honestly a bit wary of corn because of the whole GMO conspiracy, but I enjoy popcorn every now and then as a snack. I buy kernels and pop them myself on the stove in refined coconut oil then top the puffed maize with salt, paprika, and coconut butter.

Chocolate Chips

I’ve heard that chocolate is a good source of magnesium, and that people are often magnesium deficient, so I consume a small amount of this “health food” on most days.

To be frank, I’m mostly eating chocolate chips to boost my caloric intake at this point and am not concerned about my magnesium levels, so I may eliminate them for a more nutritious food and instead have them as a treat on rarer occasion.

Up and Comers

I haven’t extensively experimented with these foods yet, but I may do so in the near future.

Apple Sauce

I have been on the eye for another cheap and quick source of fruit calories to go along with orange juice, and I think this might be it. I feel it’s better to get your carbs from fruit rather than honey or refined sugars, which are for the most part devoid of vitamins and minerals. The latter are fine though, in my opinion, for topping off your glycogen stores.

I purchased one jar of organic apple sauce last week and ate it as though I had the munchies, even though it didn’t taste that amazing, so I think I might be on to something.

Brown Sugar

Immediately after I polished off that apple sauce all I could think was how incredible it would have been with a dusting of brown sugar. I also recently stumbled across the idea of adding brown sugar and egg yolk to milk, which I’m jonesing to try in lieu of molasses (hat tip Cliff McCrary).

Needless to say, I’ll be picking up a box brown sugar next time I shop for groceries.

Liver

I was graciously donned with a frozen lamb liver, gratis, at the farmer’s market last week. I’ve known for a while that liver is loaded with vitamins and minerals, but it’s such a foreign food to me at the moment and I’m sheepish about touching it.

On Sunday night I hacked off a few small chunks and attempted to swallow them without chewing, to mask the taste, nearly resulting in an untimely death of asphyxiation. Yesterday I chewed with a chaser of molasses milk, which was much less of an adventure.

The taste could have been way worse, and I’ll eventually try to cook it (like a normal person would).

Sourdough Bread

I avoid gluten for the most part, but I’ve heard that if one is to consume bread, sourdough is the safest since its fermentation process neutralizes a lot of the precarious protein. I kneed to may experiment with it at some point.

Just for Fun

I wouldn’t consider these foods to be mainstays, but I do eat them a couple times or more a month.

Ripe, In-Season Fruit

I am a sucker for good fruit. Mangoes and figs are particularly excellent when ripe. I also enjoy fresh cantaloupe and seeded watermelon.

Junk Food

I do indulge in culinary delights such as margherita pizza, salmon-avocado sushi, and spicy blue corn chips when I have the hankering for them.

On the Chopping Block

These are foods I am currently eating, but may soon eliminate from my diet.

Cheese

Milk is less expensive and cumbersome to consume. Also I’m pretty sure I’m allergic to parmigiano reggiano, which is supposed to be one of the cleanest and safest cheeses to consume, leaving me with mozzarella as one the few cheeses I find palatable in notable quantities that doesn’t cause a histaminic response.

(I’ve never been big on cheese, aside from that of the jocular variety.)

Recently Eliminated

Coffee

Dr. Peat is a proponent of caffeinated coffee, and initially I seemed to enjoy it without negative recourse, but I eventually started to develop what I believe was heartburn in due time.

I am not sure if there is a flaw with the way I prepared it (with generous amount of sugar and gelatin) or with what I consumed it with (cheese), but I do not envision myself drinking much coffee in the foreseeable future. I feel fine without it.

White Rice

I had been consuming a meal of rice and salsa in place of the milk I am now drinking, but I found over time I lost my taste for the rice. It became a chore not only to cook it, but to eat it as well.

I feel rice is a decent caloric source, only I prefer simpler sugars now. They’re easier to prepare and eat in sufficient quantities to meet the energetic demands for my goal of putting on and sustaining muscle mass.

One concession I will make though is that days after I’ve consumed large quantities of rice I’ve had several great cardio sessions.

Supplements

Vitamin E

This is one of the few vitamins I’m consistently lacking in, aside from late February or early March when I’m annihilating a case of ripe mangoes.

Vitamin K

The other vitamin I don’t seem to get adequately from my diet is K. Currently I am supplementing with a pill, but will switch to the liquid form once I run out of my current supply and apply it to my skin, rather than ingesting it.

Vitamin D

During the winter months vitamin D is more of a concern to me, as there is less sunlight and I am outside much less. I don’t really get a ton of it from my diet aside from that which is in eggs.

Vitamin A

I will likely stop vitamin A supplementation if I start eating liver somewhat regularly. It may not even be necessary anyway with adequate amounts of milk and eggs.

Epsom Salt + Baking Soda Bath

This combination is incredible for sore muscles, or relaxing in general. I toss a pound of each into a hot bath and stew for about 15-20 minutes. The magnesium in the epsom salt absorbs through your skin, causing the anti-stress response.

Eggshell Calcium

I usually take 1/4 teaspoon once or twice a day (hat tip Danny Roddy). Considering all the eggs I go through anyway, it seems like a no brainer to grind up a batch every now an then.

Anecdotally, I may have cured a case of shin splints I was suffering from last year by supplementing with eggshell calcium.

Aspirin

Peat and Roddy advocate aspirin, so I’ve been taking either one or two 325 mg tablets per day. I haven’t noticed any negative effects (even without dissolving), but do feel ever so slightly mellowed when I take it. I see no reason to stop supplementation.

Coconut Oil

This is not necessarily a supplement, but I’ve found it beneficial for my skin. I plan to apply it more regularly during the summer months.

Conclusion

I don’t claim to be in amazing shape or have a deep scientific understanding of nutrition, but I have felt good lately, which is what prompted me to write this entry. I know diet is only a small part of well-being, but it is important.

For reference, I am about 5’11”, 165 pounds, fairly active, and this is my most recent photo:

I’m going to be straight up here and make a startling confession: I am not a social media expert. I know, I know, all credibility of this post is swirling down the drain. You might as well hit the back button on your browser while you still can.

(I probably should have started off saying that I have something like 154,927 followers that keep messaging me about their free webcams…now THAT would certainly have qualified me a Twitter authority.)

For anyone that is still reading, I am going to talk about one of the topics I’ve noticed on Twitter and Facebook that seem to spark by far more conversation than than any others. That topic is food.

Even my wittiest tweets are no match for a simple update notifying my friends and followers that I am eating a boring bowl of lentil soup for lunch that day. People seem to love weighing in on their opinions about food.

Why is this so?

Food is a common ground for all people. No matter what background you come from, what interests you have, or what beliefs you stand for, you eat food.

This makes it the perfect subject to tweet about, as all of your friends can easily join the discussion. They don’t need to be in the loop per say, to be an aficionado about their tastes in food. You involve everyone in the conversation by bringing food to the table.

What other topics are good to tweet about? I think it’s as simple as looking at Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. The topics toward the base are things that just might make for decent conversation.

Of course I would not recommend updating everyone that you are on the toilet or undergoing homeostasis, but anyone is going to be able to relate if you bring up conversation about sleep or health.

The most basic aspects of your life are the areas that a majority of people are going to be the most interested in, as we all have an urgent need to fulfill these basic areas. So next time you tweet, remember to keep it simple and think of Maslow.